My life did not start at birth. My life started when i was about to end it all. At the top of my field, successful, hard worker and the life of the party any where i went. I found myself at a water tower with a .45 on my lap a half drunk bottle of some cheap vodka and no hope in life. Everything I had did not matter any more. No one needed me. No friends, away from my family, and a ex who never wanted me as a father to our beautiful little girl. As i sat there contemplating what life was about all i could think of was i hope my daughter is in good hands. I had never met her. My ex and i broke up while she was still pregnant, she told me she god pregnant by another man. and that was the last time we talked. While i sat there in my brand new lifted truck with more money than i ever had, and a hot shot in my career field. I broke down crying, talking to God. I was not cursing him this time like I did when my ex told me our daughter is another mans. I was sorry to my lord because I knew exactly what i was about to do. I talked with him and just begged him to have her call me so i could just get to know her a bit before I sent my soul to hell, "by her I am speaking about my ex." I told God he has twenty minutes before I pull that trigger. I felt as if this life was a joke. How many times have i been hurt. How many time I have been let down, how many times I let people down. I recalled every horrible thing I have ever done in life and it broke me. This image i had of my self was someone I did not know, nor wanted to be around anymore. My ex did not call me, yet someone very random did, we talked for a long time about God, Life and the spiritual world. So many things happened I could not explain. This is just the start of my salvation. I experienced some very supernatural things leading up to this talk with God and after. PSALM:144 means a great deal to me and always will. Life is funny, life is hard, life is life. My life started the day I died.
